The Language You Use

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Your Eyes are the Mirror to Your Soul,” but have you ever stopped to think that maybe your language is a mirror to your psyche? The language you choose, the things you post or write, and the actions you take are clues to your personal perspective and your ego.

Over the past five years I have been focusing on being even more open with who I am, putting it out there for folks to see and hear, and being honest with my limitations.

What I have seen has been people really resonating with what I have said as well as people strongly reacting to what I have said.

In every case, the words these respondents use give me insight to where they are coming from. This also causes me to pause and question my own reaction to their response, my own choices as to what to do, and my own language in framing my continued communication. It gives me the opportunity to take another look at my own integrity and show gratitude for those who took the time to create a response to my work.

So how do you respond to others and how do you even respond to yourself?

Let’s lift the blinds to our soul for a moment with a small peek at what I am talking about.

In his book, Power vs Force, David R. Hawkins, M.D. Ph.D talks about levels of consciousness and the testing performed around these concepts. The language you use are indicators as to where you are at any given moment on this scale. It tells me a bit about who you are.

The lower levels of Hawkins’ consciousness scale indicate a state of being that is of a victim/abuser mentality.

At the very bottom of this scale is Shame – where language indicates you believe you are not deserving.

  • I’m not worthy of love.
  • I deserve this bad thing that’s happened.
  • I’m making a fool of myself.

At the top of the lower level is Pride – where the language indicates you believe it’s your role to help others and you are self-sufficient.

  • I already know everything about the subject being communicated.
  • I don’t need anyone to help me.
  • I believe what you said was showing off.

According to Hawkins’ study, 78% of the world population fits into this grouping. That means the language you use when you talk to me and the language you use on yourself demonstrates an awareness level of victim/abuser and the majority of the world population fits into this category.

The middle levels of the Hawkins consciousness scale indicate a state of moving into self-empowerment.  

At the Lower level of this middle scale is Courage – where language indicates you can survive, even when others can’t.  

  • I feel vulnerable sharing this, but.
  • I understand that this is difficult, but bear with me while I explain my point of view.
  • I’m feeling resistance in our relationship, so let’s discuss my core values and non-negotiable boundaries.

At the top of the middle level is Reason – where the language you use indicates that everyone is capable of learning.

  • I am curious, what do you do?
  • What more can you tell me about yourself?
  • I am interested in what you have to say so tell me more.

The study goes on to say that 18% of the world population fits into this middle grouping.

And finally, the upper levels of consciousness indicate a state of moving into self-realization and spiritual consciousness.

At the Lower level of the upper scale is Love – where language indicates we can all share in happiness.

  • I create the life I live and blame no one .
  • I don’t need to live a life in a way that impresses others. I live my life in a way that keeps me happy.
  • Right now, I am at peace.

At the top of the upper level is Enlightenment – where the language you use indicates you believe in salvation and continuous evolution.

  • I am  open to the perspective of others.
  • I am introspective and curious about my continued evolution and the well-being of other.
  • I trust the journey.

Now the Hawkins study states that 4% of the world population fits into this upper grouping.

In any given moment you will float from one level of awareness to another. It is where your dominant conversation with yourself and with others is at that indicates where you should focus. You have the power to change your perspective by changing how you frame your conversations.

  • I’m not worthy of love.
    • If someone were to love me, what gift do I bring to the relationship?
    • I am really great at ____________, and this is something worth sharing.
  • I don’t need anyone to help me.
    • You know I’m uncomfortable asking for help, but I am trying it out this time.
    • This is something I can’t get done today; I am wondering if you would find the time in your life to help me.
  • I believe what you said was showing off.
    • I am reacting to what you said (did) and so am wondering what is important to me that I would react this way.
    • I realize that there is something about your language or behavior that triggers me. I am, therefore, removing you from my life until I figure out what value of mine or what boundary is being violated.

You have all the power you need within you right now to change your perspective on your life by changing the language you use. You have the ability to get curious about why you react and say what it is you say. You have the tools available to you to consciously choose to make a change in any given moment.

What would it take for you to set yourself free, to believe in yourself, to know your choices matter?

It takes allowing yourself the freedom to question your perspective and the flexibility to change your point of view while you alter your language. It takes having someone at your side guiding you through the barriers that could hold you back. It takes someone who has done it and is willing to go through it with you. Let’s talk and see if I am that someone for you. Schedule our discovery meeting today.

Leave a Reply