Today, I found myself flipping through past journals and I came across a passage on vulnerability and choices. I thought I would share this with you as well as some thoughts I have on the subject.
I found it amazing that last year I had written about being more courageous and more vulnerable.
One of the questions I posed was, “what do I need to become in order to show up to be more, to bring more to the table?”
Look at the language I chose. What to become not who do I need to become.
So, what do I need to become?
Think about that for yourself for a moment. Maybe write down a few things using the word what?
What do I need to become?
- I need to become more loving.
- I needed to become more truthful.
- I needed to become more discerning.
What do I mean by all of this?
More loving, loving of me caring about who I am. When I am able to show up and love me, then it’s very easy for me to show up and love you.
And that really is what I’m trying to do here and what I want to do is to show up from my heart for you up to becoming more truthful, more open, more purposeful.
You know, we all tell ourselves little white lies in order to feel more empowered more.
We all have our subconscious minds, our egos, that need to be right all the time, don’t we?
We have to be right.
So, I intentionally started to question my choices, my language, my friends and discernment.
Let’s get back to discernment. That’s a huge one.
Think about that word for yourself.
Do you choose your friends based on being in alignment with you?
Do you hang on to friendships, on to relationships, that really have expired? They’ve passed their season.
You know, it’s OK to let go of those past relationships.
I know I hung on for a very long time because I felt, I believed, that it was wrong and hurtful to let these friendships go, especially those that I had for such a very, very long time, and especially those who supported me during some tough times in my life. But I started to learn and realize that letting them go just meant that we have served each other and it does not mean that you’re not ever going to come back into my life.
At some time, it just means at this point in time I have other things to do and so do you.
So, give each other space to make other relationships, to connect with other people, to go down a different path and grow and grow and grow.
So, what’s the power behind the choices that I make?
Conscious choices have been a cornerstone of my coaching and a cornerstone of what I personally choose to do myself.
However, learning to make choices that are 100% yours, not choices because of someone else’s timeframe of someone else’s requirements, or someone else’s needs.
Now of course when you’re in business, sometimes you have to make choices in order to satisfy a client or satisfy your boss. The issue here is to be very sure you 100% understand your core values and that you are not compromising any of those.
In my past life I compromise my values. The results were always bad, sometimes very bad, and I lost site of who I was. And so, I don’t do that anymore and honestly, one of the things I’ll be doing this year is I will be removing people from my social media. That’s huge because social media is how I communicate with people.
If you’re not resonating with me, you’re no longer part of my tribe and that’s incredibly important. There is no judgement because once we were in alignment. We are taking a different road right now.
It’s time for me to get real.
Real with what works for me. Real with what is no longer an energy or perspective I align with. Real with the realization that letting you go may be the best thing for you as well as for me.
That doesn’t mean I am coming from a place of being harsh or cruel or angry. That doesn’t mean there resistance, a pushing away. Getting real means taking a look at the situation from not just my perspective but taking a look at the situation from your perspective, taking a look at the situation from someone else’s perspective, taking the look at the situation from a global perspective.
What is really going on here and how am I reacting versus responding?
And so, when we talk about being vulnerable, we’re talking about being sure that you own your own mess. That you own how you are reacting, and that you own the conversation.
Own the communication, the results, the results that you were experiencing and the results of the results because of the choices that you made previously. So, as you wake up today, yes, it’s a brand new day, but what is being presented to you is a reality based on choices that you have made in the past.
If you’re not happy with where you’re at, don’t blame anybody.
Take a look at the choices you’ve made and understand that you may choose to stay right in the situation that you may be not 100% happy with then that’s OK. But you have made a conscious choice for whatever reason
Be careful. Don’t make a conscious choice or any choice because of what they’re doing.
If you are blaming anybody or anything, step back and understand how you play into the situation and step back and look at your options. If you aren’t happy or if you aren’t safe, then how do you get out of that situation and change it to one that is supportive of your personal health, your personal development, and your personal wellbeing?
So being vulnerable is admitting your own stuff. In means taking a look and admitting how you show up and owning you owner mess?
It means being accountable, a huge step towards being vulnerable, because when you own it then you can say that you’re right.
- You’re right, I did do that.
- I did say that.
- This had this kind of an impact on you or on this situation
- You’re right, I own this.
But you know what?
- I also own this wonderful thing that I created.
- I also own this amazing life that I have.
- I also own the good stuff.
Owning the good and the not so good stuff means that you own the ability to change it.
How cool is that?
You have the power; you have the power to make the changes you need in your life.
You just need to own who you are and where you are right now and own the knowledge that you can take steps to change it. How willing are you to take those steps?
Vulnerability, choices, and finding your personal power to change your life.
Key topics discussed in today’s podcast are:
- becoming more loving.
- becoming more truthful.
- I needed to become more discerning.
Being vulnerable, now weak. Being vulnerable, not angry. Being vulnerable, owning your mess.
You have everything you need within you to bring out the very best of you each and every moment.
What would it take for you to set yourself free, to believe in yourself, to know your choices matter?
It takes allowing yourself to feel worthy of self-development and feeling safe and empowered. It takes having someone at your side guiding you through the barriers that could hold you back. It takes someone who has done it and is willing to go through it with you.
Let’s talk and see if I am that someone for you. Schedule our discovery meeting today.