When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Get Curious

How many times in the day do you find yourself reacting in a negative way? Have you, or someone you know, seem to get into cycles of negative events, one thing after another? Have you ever felt the world is out to get you, no one understands you, or you are just unsupported?

You know negative opportunities are presented to us all every day, from the little things like coffee spilling, losing your keys, or when you are faced with someone who just doesn’t like you: to even bigger issues like breaking up a relationship, losing a job, or losing your home. It is in the nature of your response that there is a choice and a lesson, where you can make this moment even worse, or move beyond it.

I’ve recently embarked on a 21-day meditation challenge I am hosting and am becoming even more attuned to when I am reacting in a negative manner. Each day I am getting curiouser and curiouser with what is the reality of the moment.

“Most of the problems in life are because of two reasons: I act without thinking, Or I think without acting.” ~Unknown

Many of you, like me, have triggers and when they are set off you slip into old behaviors. A few examples of how you might react are:

  •  “Why is this happening to me? Why am I so unlucky? Why doesn’t this happen to anyone else? It’s not fair!”
  • Your reaction is to lash out and place blame on the situation, or even people around you. “If they didn’t do that, this wouldn’t have happened. This is not my fault. I can’t, I need, I won’t.”
  •  “Why am I so stupid to have done that?” “Only someone like me can make such a dumb mistake.”

 “One cannot resolve an issue if one is stuck on the issue or the problem. To become mired in a problem where there is no possibility of a resolution means that there is no will to move beyond the problem.” ~  Catherine Pulsifer

You can not remove the chaos and negativity in your world, just like you can not remove the positivity all around you. The key here is to practice getting even better at making conscious choices to get curious with your reaction, identify the source of your triggers, and remind yourself you are in a new moment that is yours to create.

You could:

  • Release your frustration, and find a solution

Being frustrated will not resolve the problem but will actually make it worse. When you make decisions from a place of fear, anger, frustration, or guilt you are not making the best choices for you.

Don’t bottle up your feelings, release them, talk them out, journal them. Whatever works for you and breath.

  • You have choices so know what is in your control, then focus on what you can do

The way your respond to any situation is your choice.  Although you may have no control over what happens, you always have conscious choices and control over how you respond.

By taking positive action, you become a conscious creator of a more positive life for you.

  • What’s the lesson, what’s the gift

When things don’t go your way get curious about the response you are getting, as that is a reflection of your own energy. Ask why are you feeling this feeling? Why are they responding the way they respond? Is there a positive outcome here? There is always something to learn and an opportunity to grow even more. Take the lesson and integrate it to who you want to be.

Life is an experiential journey. That means you experience it all, good, bad, and in-between. Acknowledge the moment and exercise your right to make conscious choices that empower you even more. If not now, When?

Leave a Reply